Body Image & POP
Body image involves perceptions, thoughts, and behaviors related to one's appearance.
While a distinct entity, body image can influence both self-esteem and quality of life. Research has supported that a diagnosis of pelvic organ prolapse can impact the way an individual views and feels in their body.
Negative body image is associated with depression, anxiety, and poorer psychosocial functioning.
We asked 112 women with POP in a POP management Facebook group if POP had impacted their body image, either negatively or positively. 94.6% answered, “yes” with 90.2% noting that POP had a negative impact.
We believe it is important to hear directly from those affected. When asked about the way(s) in which POP had impacted their body image, these were some responses:
“I feel I have let my body down. I feel ugly.”
“I always thought that even if my outside wasn’t “good enough,” insides were just insides. Until my insides weren’t good enough.”
“It’s introduced a fear and distrust of what my body can handle.”
“I feel more self conscious. Even though I know they can’t, I feel like people can see my prolapse when I’m really symptomatic.“
POP can impact body image both directly and indirectly. The impact of a POP diagnosis on body image is often compounded by the myriad changes occurring to one's body when POP is often diagnosed (postpartum, menopause), the pervasive societal expectations to get one's body "back" or maintain a "desirable" body composition, a lack of education on anticipated changes and outcomes of pregnancy, birth, and aging, and a lack of adequate resources for mental health care for all.
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We can't talk about POP without addressing body image, and the conversation of body image deserves an awareness of the social/political/cultural layers that contribute to the way we view our bodies.
Consider these 5 tips to help improve body image:
Consider that you are not your body. You are not your body’s abilities. And although it may feel like your body has failed you, your body is *still* doing its best to function to the best of its ability. Consider that it’s not your body that has failed; it’s the message that your body is only “good enough” if it looks or performs a certain way that is failing you. That messaging is failing all of us.
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We are sold the idea that, in order to be valuable, we have to look or function a certain way. That messaging runs deep in our culture and helps fuel multi billion dollar industries aimed at “fixing” what’s “broken”. This messaging makes it seem like improving our body image relies on “improving” one’s body. But here’s the thing: you can change the way you feel about your body without changing your body.
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One of the first things we’re going to suggest is to consider that you are *more* than your body. Yes, your body matters, it’s relevant - we’re not suggesting it isn’t. But our friend @mamalionstrong often says, “your body is the least interesting thing about you”. So, what is *also* fabulous and interesting about you?
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Let’s take some time today to check in on that.
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Here’s your project:
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Make a list of 10 things that are great about you that aren’t related to your body. Maybe it’s your zany sense of humor, or the empathy you show your children, or your sharp knack for saying something helpful to a friend in need. Whatever it is, write it down. It doesn’t matter how big or how small or how insignificant you might feel this trait is - just write it down. And later today, pull out your list. And read it again. Before you go to bed, pull it out and read it again. See if you can add something to your list every day and keep it accessible to refer back to it often.
All bodies are worthy of care, safety, respect, and admiration. We have been led to believe that there are “good” bodies and “bad” bodies, a narrative often perpetuated in social media. The majority of “idealized” imagery features white, thin, able-bodied, clear-skinned, cisgender people.
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Research has shown that a lack of representation can negatively impact self-esteem. Research has also demonstrated that a short bout of viewing high fashion media decreases self esteem whereas viewing other media (architecture, travel) does not have the same effect.
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Chances are, you’re spending time on social media. It’s likely that you’re exposed to everyone’s posed and filtered highlight reel. We don’t have to stop seeing the beauty in these images, but what if we focused on expanding our exposure to the broad spectrum of the human experience?
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Here’s your challenge for the day: follow bodies similar to and different than your own, and different than what you wish your body could be. Follow people with bodies significantly bigger or smaller than yours, with similar or drastically different abilities. Follow people not giving a damn about their body and living their life. Follow people who engage in dialogue about bodies (their own, and our cultural views). Follow, listen, learn, embrace, and question the narratives about bodies that you’ve absorbed throughout the years.
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It’s a little trickier to find pictures of people with POP, but we’ve made it easier:
For representation of various POP-presentations, make sure to check out the gallery in our Privates Investigator blog (link in bio). We aim to include real pictures of a broad spectrum of vulvas for the purpose of education and improving genital body image. Genitals with POP are still worthy, valuable, functional, sexual - all the things genitals without POP can be. Seeing that represented (and believing it can be true for you) versus a pathologized perspective that aims to evaluate how “broken” a person’s vagina is can make all the difference.
Maybe you’ve expanded your exposure to a diverse representation of bodies and you’re still struggling. Maybe you feel overwhelmed by the thought of expanding the imagery to which you’re exposed. Maybe it’s time for a social media break and/or decluttering.
For some of us, the subliminal messaging conveyed through pretty portraits and post-workout selfies is too much. Taking some time off from social media (or deleting it altogether) might provide some much-needed space and recovery.
Consider swapping out social media for a riveting novel or an easy-to-digest comic, some satisfying balloon popping game, 2 mins of quiet breathing, texting with a friend, etc. Consider saying “see ya” to social media and “hello” to a new hobby (or revisit an activity you haven’t had the chance to explore).
Some might feel intense anxiety at the thought of deleting social media. It can be really helpful to seek support from a therapist, if so. ❤️
If you’re not interested or ready to leave entirely, consider unfollowing accounts that leave you feeling like you’re not good enough. It doesn’t have to be a permanent change, and it might even mean that you unfollow some friends/family members for a period of time. Ultimately, this is about taking care of yourself and tuning in to what is working for you right now, and what might not be working as well.
Our co-founder Haley had to take a break from her own Facebook group, POP Fitness, after realizing she was struggling to think of anything but POP. The break allowed her vital processing time.
Consider what it would feel like to allow yourself to see yourself, *truly* see yourself. Lights on, eyes open, judgments aside. Would it feel scary? Upsetting? Empowering? Uninteresting? Exciting?
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For many, the thought of being seen provokes anxiety. It's not uncommon to spend time and money to avoid being seen, to hide the parts of us that we keep hidden - there's nothing inherently wrong with this *at all* - but who decides what stays covered, and why? Many of us hide and cover ourselves - even from our own gaze - out of shame, embarrassment, disgust. As a result, we rarely see ourselves without judgment, without negative self-talk, without believing we won't be "good enough" until we can reveal something *different*.
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What if you started to allow yourself to exist, as is? What if you started to allow yourself to see yourself, and be seen, as is? What if, instead of the words of a culture obsessed with "perfection" and a narrow definition of beauty reflected back in your image, you saw yourself for who you really are - uniquely beautiful, perfectly human, and whole...just as you are?
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What if, instead of "flaws" in your thighs, you simply saw the outline of your body? What if, instead of a "broken" pelvic floor, you saw the crevices and details of your unique anatomy? What if, instead of the "problem area" of your postpartum abdomen, you saw the contour of a belly that gave life and enables your own? What if, instead of viewing yourself through the lens of a culture determined to convince you that you're not good enough, you saw yourself as what you are: someone who doesn't have to earn their worth with their body?
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And what if you let others see you, too? Yes, in that shirt that bunches up in that silly way. Yes, in those shorts that ride up. Yes, in that picture with the cellulite. Yes, with no makeup. Yes, when you're feeling upset. Yes, as you are.
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What would happen if you let yourself be seen?
...What if you saw how awesome you really are?
We believe that it's important to honestly express our feelings. Saying something like, "I hate my body" might indeed be a feeling you have, and that can be important to articulate. We also believe that our self-talk is powerful and can reinforce our beliefs. The next time you feel compelled to say something like, "I hate my body," consider swapping it with, "I will treat my body with compassion" or, "I will treat my body like I would treat a friend".
It can be challenging to give ourselves the care, positivity, and encouragement that we would easily show a friend or loved one. Knowing this, we can use our ability to empathize with others, directing it towards ourselves.
It might feel awkward at first, but here are some pointers to get you started:
1. Compliment yourself like you would a friend.
These can be related to physical attributes, or not. The next time you pass by a mirror, take a second to pick out one thing - however small - and toss yourself a compliment. Can’t think of *anything* positive? What if it’s a neutral statement? What if it’s not about your appearance?
2. Let yourself feel without judgment.
Sometimes, when we’re venting to a friend, we just want to be able to say what we’re feeling without being judged or offered a solution. Give yourself permission to feel down. It’s common for people experiencing negative body image to feel guilty for having those feelings. Recognize that it’s not some shortcoming of yours that you’re sensitive to the BS imposed on people about their bodies (both function and appearance) - it’s okay to be affected, it’s okay to feel your feelings.
3. Stand up for yourself like you would stand up for a friend.
Whether you’re standing up to your own inner bully, or outside messaging telling you you aren’t good enough, imagine how you would rally for a friend - and be that friend for yourself!
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What can you do today to be a better friend to yourself?